Horrible One-Shots That Kill Brain Cells
by xXShadyBlackCatXx
Summary: Yes, we've all seen some in our days. But you mysteriously want more. Here are random one shots I found in my Doc Manager that will kill brain cells. NOTE: May cause Nausea, neck pain, headaches, dizziness, and brain damage if read more than 5 chapters per hour. Rated T for Terrible!
1. Alderheart X Catmint

Once there was a button. It sat there. The cats thought it was the pressing button, so they pushed it. Nothing happened. Then Starclan arrived. "Whatcha need?" Yellowfang said, before looking at all the assembled cats. Crickets chirp. Starclan disappeared.

They pressed it again. "Hi, my name is Catmint." A she cat that looked suspiciously like Spottedleaf appeared from the sky. Alderheart broke up with herbs'n medicine to be with Catmint. "But, You're special!" Velvet sobbed. Then Alderheart and Catmint decided to get married.

But Catmint wasn't registered in the official warrior cat list, so she was given a new warrior name. (Sunshinelight) Then Bramblestar decided to have the biggest wedding ever for his son.

* * *

**Um.. YOU'RE NOW PART OF THE ONE-SHOT CLUB!**

**I found this staring at me in my Doc Manager and I was confused...**


	2. Win A date with Hollyleaf goes wrong

"Welcome to win a date with Hollyleaf! Our first contestants are... Hawkfrost, The evil one... Bramblestar, The one who tried... And Tigerheart/star!"

Irisgaze said cheerfully. Hollyleaf groaned. Squrrielflight and Dovewing might kill her. "First question: What is your fav flavor of ice cream?" Irisgaze said.

Irisgaze kept a watch on Bramblestar, She didn't want Holly to date him cause, Iris wanted to make out with him.

Bramblestar replied first " Mouse cake! so mousy!" Hollyleaf Stared at him. Yuck! "Thunderpath rats!" Hawkfrost responded eagerly. These were SERIOUS creeps.

Tigerheart said at last " Rabbit cream..." "NOBODY!" Hollyleaf yelled. "Fu-" "Holly! There are kits watching!" Apple snapped. " I meant.. fudge cream with rabbit sprinkles! Its my favorite!"

Irisgaze rolled her eyes and then remembered something.

" Oh, The winner gets to take Hollyleaf to the Dark Forest, A creepy horror park! No points for anyone! Okay next question : Who should be alive again?"

Bramblestar screamed "^%& *^! Goldenflower! My mother would love me always!"

"And your mother would tell you to wash your mouth out with soap you freak! Ashfur!" Apple snarled. Ashfur walked in. He noticed Squrrielflight looking nervously.

"Squrrielly dear, I WILL HURT BRAMBLESTAR IF YOU DON'T BEAR MY KITS YOU *%^$%#& ! " Hollyleaf and Hawkfrost gaped. Tigerheart was humming, 'roar' by Kalepears.

" I declare the winner, Hawkfrost, Because we have some mentally insane mouse brains" Irisgaze said happily. Sorreltail popped out "Lets go cindy! I'll show you how to get yourself some kits!" Hollyshine snarled

" What type of mother are you you freak?" Lionblaze nodde

" Crap, Was that my mother in-law?" Lionblaze gulped at the hungery looks Sorreltail and Cinderheart were giving him.

**Few hours later...**

Hollyshine and Hawkfrost stepped out of the studio. You could clearly see Hollyleaf was trying not to even touch Hawkfrost.

Once they entered a creepy looking shack, they both sat there bored. Hawkfrost looked at hollyleaf's sleek, but fluffy fur. Suddenly he had an idea.

"So, Holly, did ya know that me and sorrel were once partners?" "For what?" Hollyleaf said uneasily. "For this pretty!" _Camera breaks, ending with a scream_

* * *

**Edits were made to save the public.**

**It was worse before, trust me.**


	3. The Great Battle 2

A battle raged where every cat fought every cat.

Alliances were only a few cats

There wasn't a chance of survival..

But at the end, Only Squrrielflight, Tawnypelt, Tigerstar, Nightcloud, Leafpool, and Mistystar Survived.

They made a truce, to never fight again. They realized the Lake was all theirs, so they formed a clan called EverClan. It would never die out, like the other clans. But they couldn't make a clan out of only warriors and leaders, so they all went to the Moonpool to ask for guidance.

They could bring cats to life by exchanging lives. Mistystar gave 8 while Tigerstar gave 1.

Squrrielflight wanted Hollyleaf, and Juniperkit

Leafpool wanted Crowfeather,

Mistystar wanted Bluefur, Mosskit and Stonefur.

Tigerstar wanted Flametail

Nightcloud wanted Breezepelt

Tawnypelt wanted Dawnpelt

They were finally a full clan!

* * *

**EVERCLAN ALLEGIANCES**

**Leader: **Tigerstar

**Deputy: **Dawnpelt

**Medicine cats:**

Leafpool: Small brown tabby she cat with a white chest & paws and Amber eyes

Flametail: Flame colored tom with blue eyes

**Warriors:**

Mistyfoot: Blue grey she cat with blue eyes

Hollyleaf: Black she cat with green eyes

Crowfeather: Dark gray tom (ALMOST BLACK) with blue eyes

Stonefur: Light blue grey tom with Blue eyes

Breezepelt: Black tom with Amber eyes

Tawnypelt: Tortoiseshell she cat with Green eyes

**Queens/Kits:**

Squrrielflight: Dark ginger she cat with one white paw and green eyes (Mother to Juniperkit: Red brown tom with amber eyes)

Bluefur: Blue grey she cat with Blue eyes(Mother to Mosskit: Gray and white she cat with blue eyes)

* * *

Tawnypelt padded around the lake sadly. Rowanclaw wasn't there, and she'd never experienced a time like that! She only wished that maybe somebody she knew, somebody who wasn't her kits could talk to her.

"Hello." Nightcloud said as she came near Tawnypelt.

"Isn't it lonely?" Tawnypelt asked her.

"Sometimes I wish maybe Crowfeather actually cared about me not..not her.." Nightcloud agreed.

They both glanced at Crowfeather and Leafpool sharing tongues. "What about..Stonefur?" Tawnypelt replied. "Nope." Nightcloud said. "Tigerstar?" Tawnypelt said with a smirk. "Maybe.." Nightcloud said.

* * *

Juniperkit woke up. Mosskit was already out and the Queens were gossiping. He padded outside. Hollyleaf was teaching Mosskit the Warrior code, and Leafpool and Crowfeather were sharing tongunes

* * *

**Even stranger...**


	4. Mapleshade and the grass cat

**MAPLESHADE'S FUTURE**

Mapleshade is a nice she-cat. Appledusk is in the same clan as her. Reedshine is a idiot who is super depressed because Appledusk never loved her and never noticed her.

So she literally decided to 'become one with the grass'.

Reedshine says she loves Appledusk before she attempts to become one with the grass, which is super sad for her and not me.

Mapleshade and Appledusk have kits named Rainflower(She) and Goldrain(Tom).

Goldrain's mate is Shallowwind and Rainflower's is Shellheart.

Rainflower isn't mean cause Appledusk never died (I'm pretty sure that's her case: She thought she wasn't loved and that's why she threw it back at Crookedstar) .

Storm kit is still Stormkit. Which means Stormstar not crooked star. Willowbreeze is still alive, So Sliverstream, Waterbird , Glazepetal are born.

Water and Glaze are born in a second litter, which means that Sliverstream's littermates are still in Starclan with Snowfur and Mosskit and they all play tag on Wednesdays.

Goldrain dies from greencough but his kits Flytail and Hallowfish still live until the arc after vision of shadows, then Hallowfish Mysteriously dies from a fox that was prowling around where they were patrolling.

Sliverstream and Graystripe live a happy life in Riverclan and Firestar still thinks that Graystripe died since he never attended gatherings but he doesn't know that Sandstorm was secretly bearing the second litter of his kits, so when he finds out he goes nuts.

Happy good nuts. Squrrielpaw and Leafpaw wait eagerly for the kits.

Brambleclaw is literally OUT of Squrrielflight's life by the end because she ended up only noticing Ashfur since he always volunteered to help Squrriel with kitsitting the kits.

And the kits are named Emberkit(Tom) and Cloudykit(She cat). Cloudykit looks like Brindelface Sandstorm's mother and Emberkit looks like Jake/ Princess mixed up. And make up the rest with your mind 'kay? Good. Bye. My job here is done.

* * *

**SLIGHT EDITS MADE TO SAVE THE PUBLIC**


	5. Tomato the Kittypet

once upon a time there was a awesome kitty named Tomato

he go to carter shool of awesomeings

thn he k=join the clan

he jon mt y clan its caled thunerclan

thn we dance

* * *

There was a very nice kitten named Tomato who joined the clans to make them better.

First they played hokey pokey, then truth or dare then funland

After that they killed Tomato because he wasn't fun anymore!

Oh my!

They killed him!

GASP!

*Reaction*!

OMg!

* * *

**Ooookay...**


End file.
